Read them, enjoy them, save them and learn from them.

Thanks to IndieWire for compiling a running list of what’s available. Here are direct links to some of our currently available favorites:

“Hail, Caesar!” screenplay by Joel and Ethan Coen

“Captain Fantastic”  screenplay by Matt Ross

“The Secret Life of Pets” screenplay by Cinco Paul, Ken Daurio, and Brian Lynch

Sure, you won’t be able to find any non-fiction literature about this exact topic, but there are ways around that. You can break it down. Science already knows what would happen to earth if humans were taken out of the equation. Or the worldwide impact of a nuclear war. There are also documented cases of different species crossbreeding. Or you can research an emotionally similar situation, like a well-documented mixed-race relationship in a 1920’s segregated America. Then let your imagination do the rest. Research can give you the building blocks for any kind of script, but why is it important, when do you do it and how much is needed?

Why?

If you write about something you know nothing (or very little) about, chances are it will feel fake. Remember that interesting characters are products not just of your creative whim, but of their own situation. Their place in the world. Their lot in life. The choices they make. If these places, circumstances and choices aren’t rooted in at least their own reality, then everything that character says or does will feel fake. Similarly, if you base your post-apocalyptic love story on your own ten favorite post-apocalyptic movies, then the world you’re creating will feel like a rehash rather than a rich, deep environment.

When?

The script pros might tell you that a good script begins with a great idea. A spark, as they say. I would agree. Instead of researching your way into a good story, research your way out of it. Know the basics of what kind of trouble you want to put your character in first, then use research to truthfully and accurately get her out of said trouble. If you start researching blindly, hoping to stumble across a good story, you could be looking for a very long time. Which brings us to the final question:

How much?

There are different thoughts on this and I think it’s important to distinguish between researching the world in which you are playing out your story, and the details pertaining to your plot. Once you have decided on a time and place for your story, you will need to do your research on the social, political, cultural and technological zeitgeist. Your characters will have different motivations and make different choices based on the environment you put them in, so make sure you know enough about that environment to sustain your viewer’s suspension of disbelief. If you’re writing about an American family in the 60’s, don’t have them plan their dream vacation to Cuba. And definitely don’t have them look up flight deals on their cellphones. You get the point. The research you need to do for the world of your story should be extensive, unless you’re writing about a time and place you are already very familiar with.

If you know enough about the world your story is set in, the plot should fit right in. The research needed for your plot details will then be more of the creative kind. It can be to give your language flavor and depth, like accurately naming the kind of spear an Amazon warrior uses to wound your protagonist as she treks through the jungle, or using factual, historical events as inspiration for what might happen to a homosexual character serving in the military.

For both kinds of research, however, the experts recommend giving yourself a limited amount of time before you need to bring your attention back to actually writing the damn thing. When researching the world, you might give yourself two months. That’s two months of documentaries, non-fiction literature, novels, articles – maybe even interviews with people who have lived in the time and place you are researching for. When researching plot, you might give yourself as little as one hour to go digging for clues whenever you need the inspiration. Google searches, wikipedia, trips to the library, call a friend – then back to work.

Creating your own system

So there you have the grand thoughts about doing research – but what about the nuts and bolts? Here are some tips and tricks.

 1. Carry an idea workbook. This is a place you can jot down thoughts, facts, to-do lists and anything else that might come in handy when you sit yourself down to type. This is not so much your story bible, as it is your knowledge bank of everything you’ve gathered along the way. It’s unfiltered and full of creativity. It can be a Dropbox folder you can add to from both smartphone and laptop, or it can be – which I would personally prefer – a beautiful, leather-bound notebook.

2. Write down your overall plot summary. Then let that be your compass when doing research. If you feel yourself going down a rabbithole, return to your plot summary and ask yourself how this research benefits your plot. If it doesn’t, get back on track.

3. Set up interviews. Don’t be afraid to reach out to people you think will be able to offer an interesting perspective on the particular subject you’re researching. It’s part of the human psyche – we love talking about what we do or what we have done.

4. Know your stuff and don’t cut corners. You can use creative license, of course, but only do so when you’re doing so intentionally and not simply out of a lack of knowledge. Chances are that someone out there – a reader, a viewer, a producer, an actor – knows just as much as you, or more. Remember, you need to suspend disbelief, not create it.

And speaking of actors knowing their stuff, check out this list of 10 Actors Who Conducted Insane Research For Iconic Movie Roles.

In the post it’s pointed out how screenwriters can learn a great deal from studying the work of their (probably more successful) peers. We obviously couldn’t agree more, but let’s take it even a step further and make these screenplays required reading for any budding filmmaker. You will not just learn about structure, story and dialogue. You’ll also find out what choices the director made, what choices the cinematographer made, how the designers made the scripted world come alive and how the actors breathed life into the written dialogue.

Study the work of others. Use it. Enjoy it. Learn from it. Download one of these scripts, break it down and make a shot list, watch the film, see what you missed or how your choices would have changed the experience. Whichever way you decide to use it, this is a great resource.

Download the screenplays for Inside Out, Room, Carol, Straight Outta Compton, Trainwreck, Trumbo – or see the complete (and continuously updated) list on IndieWire.

Not included on the list (at time of writing, at least) is Aaron Sorkin’s screenplay for Steve Jobs. Here you go.

That said. I find it helpful to not only study and know these little nuggets of wisdom and have them at the back of my head when I’m trying to get the creative juices flowing. It’s also a fun cheat-sheet to revisit for inspiration. But let’s back-track a little bit. I remember seeing these 22 short storytelling mantras – reposts and/or reworks of the 22 original tweets by then Pixar employee Emma Coats – a while back, but it wasn’t until I came across this free e-book by Stephan Bugaj that I really dove into the meaning of them all. And understood where they came from, which you will to once you read Stephan’s e-book introduction. Which you must.

When you have done just that, you may enjoy the following. These are the tweets by Emma Coats, visually represented by your favorite Pixar characters, as posted by imgur user Dinolgnacio.

All Disney copyrights, trademarks, and logos are owned by The Walt Disney Company.

h/t Emma Coats, Dinolgnacio on imgur and Stephan Bugaj.

Nope, there’s still another step you’ll want to get done first: Copyrighting the script. Now, understanding what is involved in a copyright is the key to understanding when, how and why you should begin this process. Believe it or not, it’s not as complicated as your think it is.

We did it online at the WGA and copyright office. Very quick and easy – and it was interesting – I made a mistake on the copyright office application and they called me and corrected it. – Joe Crump, Director of The Storyteller

We’ve all seen the little circle with a “c” inside. But what does this symbol and material being copyrighted actually mean? To find out we need to understand the definition. According to the Merriam Webster Dictionary, a copyright is “the exclusive legal right to reproduce, publish, sell, or distribute the matter and form of something (as a literary, musical, or artistic work).”

But wait a second, Heather – I’m the author of my script, doesn’t that mean that I already have the “exclusive legal right?” The answer is both yes and no. Yes – because from the moment you have completed your finished script all countries recognize that you, the writer, own the copyright for your creation. However, the problem arises when you have to prove that ownership in a court of law.

We’ve all heard the horror story, someone takes your script, tears off your title page and puts one with their name on the by-line; they’ve stolen your script. Then they make the movie, and that movie goes on to make millions upon millions. They can’t get away with it – so you hire a lawyer and go after them. Now you have to legally prove that you wrote the script first. Having a copyright of your material helps prove that your script is in fact your script.

Don’t steal ideas – it’s not worth it… just ask Johnny Depp:

Question: Is registering a script with the WGA enough to prove ownership?

Registering your script with the WGA is an important step that offers benefits that will supplement the copyright, BUT it does not act as a proof of ownership in a court of law. Two of the key benefits of registering with the WGA are: 1) You will have a date of creation with the union and 2) A WGA member will appear in a court of law to testify on that date of creation with the union.

But why would you need such testimony? To prove that you own your script – something that a copyright does automatically.

In addition, the length of a WGA registration is 5 years. After such time you’ll have to re-register the script. A copyright lasts the length of the author’s lifetime plus at least 70 years, more if the copyright is with a corporation.

Question: I’ve already begun sending my script out, is it too late to copyright my material?

No, the benefits change but your script will be protected. Bottom line, a late copyright is better than no copyright.

Want to learn more about the benefits of a WGA registration versus Copyright? Check out this helpful article from The Writers Store.

Think of it this way – a baby gets a birth certification, a car gets a registration, and even our pets get registered. Your script is just as important (let’s face it, maybe even more important) and deserves to be just as protected.

So now that we know what a copyright is and why it’s important to have one, the question is when should the script be registered?

We waited till we had a full draft that we were happy with, but before we sent it out to any readers or friends. – Joe Crump, Director of The Storyteller

You cannot copyright an idea. This is because an idea can be turned into several different creations. You need to write down your creation. This can mean a treatment or the full script. The more complete your copyrighted document (be it a treatment or the script), the better it distinguishes your idea.

We’ve gone over the what and the why, all that’s left is the how. Registering for both a copyright and with the WGA can be done online. Go WGA’s dedicated website to register with the WGA. It’s $10 for members or $20 for non-members and takes about 5 minutes (hence why it’s such a popular choice).

To register for a copyright, go to http://www.copyright.gov/. From there you will click on the “register your work” tab and begin the process of registering your script.

I’m not worried about someone stealing my script – we’ve even posted it online for others to read and give us feedback. It’s too hard to make a movie and no one would spend all that time and money only to worry about legal issues later. – Joe Crump, Director of The Storyteller

Here’s the thing, articles like this one tend to illicit fear in writers, makes us want to turn off the internet, lower our voice to a whisper if we dare to start talking about our idea or even close the laptop when we see someone looking at us while we write. Don’t be afraid to share your work. Being a writer, especially a screenwriter, means that in order for your script to get made into a film, eventually someone else has to read your work.

Join us next time when we dive deeper into another aspect of the filmmaking process: Music, Licensing and it’s many uses. Until then, here’s clip from a panel that echoes Joe sentiments about sharing work.

The following interview was conducted for the Boulder Writers’ Workshop by Lori DeBoer. Lori is the founder of the Boulder Writers’ Workshop and works as an independent writing teacher and coach. She is a contributing editor for Short Story Writer and has had more than a thousand articles and essays published in newspapers, magazines and literary journals, including The New York Times.

Erik V. Wolter is a screenwriter, author and producer with more than twenty screenplays to his credit. If you haven’t already, be sure to also read Part I of this interview.

Is it possible to be a screenwriter working in Colorado, or do you have to fly to the West Coast a lot?

The sources available online make it possible to be a screenwriter anywhere. Being in LA and in a position to make personal connections is certainly a plus, but in no way is it necessary anymore.

Your most recent novel, Break the Stage, is based on screenplay you wrote for a movie that is now being filmed. Can you talk about that story and its genesis?

Getting hired to write the screenplay for Break the Stage came as a result of striking up a conversation with a director while working out at a fitness center. That assignment led to them optioning a series of scripts and even some unfinished projects of mine they liked because they are looking for movies with a positive message for young people.

Both TV and feature filmmakers have fallen in love with adaptations of novels, especially but not exclusively true stories. Because of my first book and the adaptation of a novel I did for a production company with the rights to The Trials of Adrian Wheeler, I now get asked to adapt other books to screenplays or the reverse, novelize a script. Break the Stage, the book, is a novelization of the script. As a result, it reads more like a movie but with details, back story, and personal reflection of the characters that sometimes fail to come across in a visual medium. Although I always admired real novelists for their prose and poetic style, I was (still am) thoroughly intimidated. Novelistic style in a screenplay is verboten, so lucky me. I am most comfortable with screenwriting, but willing to work on the skills of writing one finds in a traditional novel.

What has it been like to live the Hollywood life? Have you been involved with the shooting?

The closest I’ve come to living the Hollywood life was watching Entourage on a regular basis.

Break the Stage is being shot entirely in and around Orlando, and I was on set for the first week of filming. Seldom do screenwriters get to enjoy seeing first-hand the process of taking what they have written and making it come to life. It was a treat to say the least. Typically, directors are reluctant to have the writer on set for fear of having the writer interfere with the director’s vision. In my case, the relationship I had with the director was positive. He wanted my input. And the fact that I was also executive producer didn’t hurt either. That said, I may have ruffled a few feathers of actors and crew a couple of times by stepping in when I saw dialogue or action of the actors straying significantly from the storyline. The younger actors in particular sometimes didn’t realize that nuances in behavior or dialogue shouldn’t be dismissed or changed with an ad-lib. It could alter their character or some other thread in the story down the line that would make no sense. Scenes are not filmed in the order they appear in the script so it is easy for less experienced actors to miss the big picture. Call backs for retakes days later because the story has been compromised are expensive.

You’ve done well recently in a competition for screenplay writing. Can you tell us a little bit about that?

There is one school of thought that screenplay competitions are a waste of time and money, partly because the number of entries is mind-boggling, making chances of winning slim. Many contests are criticized as being nothing more than money machines for the organizers. There is a flip-side to that cynicism. They do offer a chance of getting a script read, usually by someone who can make a difference. Odds are better if the script advances to the later rounds. Some contests offer feedback for a little more money, so if you request feedback you’re practically guaranteed they have read the entire script. Unless the contest rules state otherwise, the read of your screenplay may end after ten or fifteen pages. And in the final analysis, some contests stand out from the rest. Page, Nicholl, BlueCat, Austin, Screenplay Festival, Script Pipeline, Tracking Board, Final Draft, Scriptalooza all have excellent reputations. If that seems like a long list, there are many more out there who aren’t in the same ballpark.

I go for long periods of time not entering, but whenever I like to get a sense of where the script stands compared to what else is out there I will enter. There is always hope that it will do well enough to not abandon the story and take a shot at another rewrite. If what I have doesn’t advance past the first round, I know it has serious problems. But I never enter with any thoughts of winning. In the first place, winning is no guarantee that your script will get made. Many never do. Making the finals will at least make your script worthy of a writing sample that may open a door to a writing assignment somewhere in the industry.

A screenplay based on Loyalty on Trial made the Finals of the Page Awards in 2012. I have had a few others place in the semi-finals of contests. This year Footsteps of My Father was a Finalist in BlueCat and the Screenplay Festival. And I was honored to receive a first place in the 2015 Ink Awards for my screenplay, Break The Stage, and in the nonfiction category for my book, Loyalty on Trial: One American’s Battle with the FBI.

Do you have a genre that you prefer to write in? Can you speak about the differences between the genres?

Serious drama is my preference. Maybe that’s because I’ve never been a fan of anything not grounded in reality, meaning Sci-Fi might have a realistic story just set in the future. A thriller may be scary yet realistic, but horror too far-fetched. Fantasy and supernatural don’t do anything for me either, but mystery and suspense do. And I have to admit, I do enjoy those so-called “chick flicks,” love stories or romantic comedies.

What writers have influenced you and why?

Jack Kerouac, Salinger, and Kurt Vonnegut made my head spin when I was very young. I admired Faulkner, Hemingway, and Steinbeck as a high school student. Emerson and Whitman made me think. I envied Frost and Sandberg as poets. Bertrand Russell set my head straight. And when it comes to screenwriters, I would love to have just a fraction of the talent of Mamet, Sorkin, Simon, Lucas, or Spielberg.

How have you gone about improving your writing craft?

I began by reading as many books on screenwriting as I could find. I still look for anything new that has been released. There are more blogs and websites offering advice than one can keep up with, but Script Shadow by Carson Reeves is one that I read daily. Reading screenplays that are made available on line is a great way to learn what works and what doesn’t. Coverage and feedback from professional analysts has been invaluable.

What do you find most challenging aspect of writing and how have you overcome that challenge?

In screenwriting, structure has been a challenge. Establishing characters distinctive voice in writing dialogue is a continuing struggle. In my brief adventure in novel writing, I constantly fumble POV. I’m afraid that overcoming these challenges is a work in progress. Oh yes, commas. Commas do me in more often than I like.

Do you have a writing routine?  

I’m usually at my desk by 5am. From then on, my day may or may not be solid writing, but it will be definitely related to my work. With projects in development or like now with a script in production, emails, texts, and phone calls intrude with focused writing. I may be working on a new script, researching, pitching, and rewriting a couple of projects all at the same time. Which ones get the most attention will depend on deadlines, some self-imposed, some real. If I feel compelled to shut out all these other distractions, I will block out a few hours to just write, deal with all the non-writing necessary nonsense, then return to writing setting aside another block of time, either late afternoon and/or late at night.

Are you a “plotter” or a “panster”?

I create a rough outline of the story or beat sheet. I like to script the opening and ending based on my logline. In the outline I try to identify the inciting incident, first act turning point, the midpoint, and all is lost moment that begins the third act. I will also write up a brief bio and back story of the main characters. But once I start into actually writing the script, I don’t allow myself to be bound by that outline. If the characters take me in a different direction, I will see where it takes the story and change my storyline or scene sequences if need be.

How do you come up with your ideas?

I have found that my own experiences may often serve as a foundation of an idea. Social issues and relationships with others tend to get my attention. I may see something in the newspaper, on TV or the internet that sparks a “What if?” I used to take my dog to this dog park in Florida. There was a wooded area adjacent to it where you could wander through as well as the normal open area that fronted a lake. It looked like an ideal spot for a homeless person to set up camp. Totally separate to the dog park, I often saw a homeless man on a bike while I was on my way home from school. He had a little basket on the front of the bike. There was an ongoing controversy of a historic home about to be demolished in town. Next thing I know, I’m writing a romantic comedy about a homeless guy who puts his little dog in the basket on his bike who lives in the woods at the dog park. A young teacher who is fighting to preserve her historic home encounters this mysterious charismatic homeless guy at the dog park. Their dogs, although polar opposites, like each other, and then… What was the question again?

What intrigues you the most about writing and storytelling? Characterization? Plot? What?

Characterization and dialogue intrigue me the most. If I go into why, this interview will never end and I will have a ton of emails to answer, fallen further behind in my latest project, and anyone still reading this is already about to click that x at the top of the page and go back to their own writing.

Do you ever get discouraged and why? What keeps you going?

As an older writer, one who started so late in life, I take rejection with a grain of salt. I don’t get discouraged, I look at it as a learning experience and plod on, keeping in mind the sense of urgency that I have to catch-up, if you will, before “Father Time” declares FADE OUT:

How have you grown as a writer over the years? What do you know now that you didn’t know when you started out?

Admittedly, I am a long way from being a “household name” as an author or screenwriter, but after ten years of effort, and if all goes right during the next five years, it looks like I’m in a position to make a few movies and write a few more books. It’s been a fun ride.

One thing I told a class of students recently that is a lesson I learned and may be worth repeating. “Whether you are wanna-be writers or dream about some other career; talent is way over-rated. The cliché is accurate. Take advantage of the opportunities given to you to learn the skills required, work at them harder and longer than you ever thought possible, seize the chance to take advantage of luck that may come your way, and stay the course, as long as you love what you are doing. You may not win the Oscar, be # 1, or super-rich, but you will have a level of success that allows you to feel good about yourself and to live your dream.”

That pretty much sums up my journey.

What can we expect from you next?

How about if I keep it short and simple next time I’m asked a question? Seriously, I have a sequel in the works to Break the Stage the movie, and high hopes for a couple of scripts in development. I am in the process of collaborating with another writer to novelize some of my existing scripts, and collaborating with a writer to revise a script. And then… never mind, I’ll keep you posted.

A big thanks to both Erik V. Wolter and Lori DeBoer for sharing this wonderful interview with us!

The following interview was conducted for the Boulder Writers’ Workshop by Lori DeBoer. Lori is the founder of the Boulder Writers’ Workshop and works as an independent writing teacher and coach. She is a contributing editor for Short Story Writer and has had more than a thousand articles and essays published in newspapers, magazines and literary journals, including The New York Times.

Erik V. Wolter is a screenwriter, author and producer with more than twenty screenplays to his credit.

You have a background in education and taught for many years. Have you always been writing or is this a second career?

If writing a few articles for my grade school and high school newspaper counts, then I’ve been writing a very long time. Like so many writers, I was encouraged by a high school English teacher who took me aside and said I should be an English major in college. I failed to heed her advice, focused on history and political science, only to decade’s later regret it when I found myself scrambling to hone those fundamental skills other writers take for granted. My interest in political and social issues did serve to prompt me to write frequent letters to the editor on controversial issues, causing me to parse every word out of fear that it might actually appear in the paper or evoke the wrath of someone’s rebuttal that would allow them to get the last word. Today, as a result, I’m not one to write quickly in a stream of consciousness style. I tend to dissect every scene and strive to get it as close to my version of perfection before moving on with the story, typically not recommended, especially if you can’t handle sleep deprivation.

But to answer your second question, I began writing Loyalty on Trial in 2001 and it was published in 2004. Before I left teaching in 2011, I was fortunate to be hired to write two screenplays on assignment for a production company, wrote five original scripts, and acquired an agent. It’s only since then I could really claim a second career was launched. Being able to devote full time to writing had everything to do with five collaborations with other writers, an assignment to adapt a novel in development with another LA production company, six more spec scripts, and the Y/A novelization of my screenplay, Break the Stage now in the final stages of filming in Orlando, Florida.

“Get a life, Erik!” Feel free to say it out loud. I have heard that very comment in my own home and not from my two dogs. Seriously though, here’s the subtext for any writer frustrated with trying to find the time to write in the context of family, job, and still have a “life.” I play tennis, ski, and work out. I also have dinner with my wife nightly where we share out thoughts and discuss… you name it. When I was teaching, I made time to write by treating it as a part-time job that required a commitment of a certain number of hours daily. The fact that I couldn’t wait to get to that second job made it the best moonlighting experience ever. I’d bet that any fellow-writer reading this has had more formal training in writing than I have, and can run circles around me when it comes to pounding out pages on the keyboard. Therefore, you know what comes next. If I can do it…

Has your teaching informed your writing in any way?

What made this journey possible was the fact that I was a veteran teacher when it all began. I knew how to organize my time, had the work ethic to stay at it late into the night, and sacrifice summers and other holidays for time to write. And retiring in 2011 clearly gave me an opportunity to establish a second career, and unlike a younger person trying to break into this writing biz, I didn’t have the pressure to make a living solely off of my writing.

You’ve written in many genres—novels, screenplays, nonfiction. How have you come to be involved in so many different types of writing?

Most of the screenwriting gurus advise against writing for multiple genres because agents and managers claim they prefer to market a writer who has a track record of success in one genre. Develop the skills required in that one genre and you will acquire a following and be more marketable, they claim. That may work for some, but I wanted to experiment in as many genres and mediums as I could when I started out. And I couldn’t buy into the idea that I had to focus on one when in fact my interests and experiences were diverse. But I do agree that if you discover that you are really successful in one genre, it makes sense to focus most of your attention there.

Which genre excites you the most or do you like them all?

Other than horror, I like them all. Liking straight comedy though isn’t enough. Apparently, writing comedy works best if you are actually funny. I have had more success in drama than any other genre, but I still get tempted to take a chance and test myself in something new if I have a story in mind.

Tell us about Loyalty on Trial: One American’s Battle with the FBI, which is based on your father’s experience. Could you talk about the book and how that project came to be?

My odyssey from AP Government and Politics teacher to full-time writer began in the summer of 2001. I flew to Chicago to help my sister move my mother out of the house where our family lived since 1945. My mother, a German immigrant, who celebrated her 99^th birthday in March, was moving to Las Vegas to be closer to my sister. Dad, also born in Germany, died in 1994. Mom asked me to bring down a sealed box from a shelf in her closet. She said, “Dad would have wanted you to have this.” What the box disclosed became the catalyst for Loyalty on Trial: One American’s Battle with the FBI.

My father was that American. He chose to keep his experience with the FBI sealed in that box for nearly sixty years. The box revealed that he was charged with disloyalty and subsequently denaturalized after a high-profile trial in 1942, but on appeal to the Supreme Court the decision was overturned based on First Amendment rights of speech and association. In the box, I found a 700 page trial transcript, newspaper clippings, and a scrapbook of columns he wrote for a German language newspaper in the 1930’s.

After staying up the entire night and digesting it all, my sister said, “You should write a book about this.” My response was something like, “Yeah sure, me… write a book.” But after returning home to Florida, I was intrigued. How did this ever happen? And from what I read, it was obvious that there had been thousands of other German Americans and German nationals interned in camps across the country and many deported. As an American History major and U.S. Government teacher, I had to wonder how this slipped through the cracks. Here was an untold story from WWII that demonstrated how patriotic fervor can lead to paranoia, intolerance, and repression when government seeks expedient means to achieve an alleged “greater good,” only not to be found in any high school textbook.

How did the research and writing of that book unfold?

I filed a Freedom of Information request with the Federal Government, and two weeks later a box was at my doorstep when I came home. The 1,000 pages of FBI files, including, confidential informants, illegal “mail covers” and letters about my father signed by J. Edgar Hoover was enough to convince me that a book should be written, at least by someone. About that time, the horrific attack on 9/11 happened. The parallels of how German Americans and Americans of Middle-Eastern descent were treated based on societal hysteria and unjustified profiling by the government were striking. So I took the plunge into documenting my Dad’s story.

What was the biggest challenge in writing and publishing the book?

After months of pursuing university press publishers, only to receive praise for the work but polite rejections due to not having a PHD, I took the self-publishing road. By 2004 I was an author of a book that was positively reviewed in history circles and by First Amendment advocates, including the president of the ACLU. Without the resources of a traditional publisher, and despite my own efforts, marketing the book never amounted to much. But then I heard, and not just from my sister, “This would make a great movie.”

How did you move from that book into being involved in screenwriting?

While still teaching, I immersed myself into studying screenwriting. There was no shortage of material online, including how-to books, consultants, script analysts, and sample screenplays. But my early attempts to transform my book to a screenplay produced a script that frankly was quite awful. And that was a good thing because as you know, writing is rewriting and that is doubly true for screenplays. Ultimately, the fictional version of my book made the Finals in 2012 of the Page Awards. During that time, I gained experience as I wrote more scripts about that with which I was most familiar, teenagers and history. Coverage and contest results continued to be more positive than negative. One thing I learned along the way, making stuff up (or should I say creating), even if it is drawn from actual events, real people, or your own experience is much more enjoyable than writing nonfiction, at least for me. I tried my hand in other genres just to see if I could and discovered that only horror and straight comedy weren’t my cup of tea.

Was it difficult writing about something historical that had personal ties?

Despite having personal ties to the story, my training and experience as a teacher told me the best approach was to document the story from the perspective of the government acting in wartime versus an immigrant torn between his devotion to his new country and his attachment to the ongoing turmoil taking place in the country of his birth. Balancing those elements within the broader context of civil liberties guaranteed by the U.S. Constitution would be my challenge. According to the Midwest Book Review, I was reasonably successful, “Loyalty On Trial relies so heavily on primary sources and the transcript of the trial itself that it does not pretend to read like a novel; instead, it offers the straight facts to the reader, leaving him or her to judge Wolter’s loyalty and the dubious American policy that almost certainly forced unjust imprisonment and deportation upon thousands of innocent German-Americans.”

How many screenplays have you written and what has been your experience in pitching them and getting them produced?

To date, my resume lists twenty-two screenplays. Five of those were collaborative efforts with other screenwriters, and another five were writer for hire assignments. Pitching the remaining original specs was time consuming and a never-ending process. Having an agent is a foot in the door when it comes to queries and credibility, but promoting your own work is a given. The film industry provides numerous opportunities to pitch one’s work online and in person via pitch fests in LA. I have had good results online from Ink Tip and Virtual Pitch Fest. Coverage services like the Black List and the Tracking Board are sources to get your work noticed, and screenplay contests, although extremely competitive, have been known to launch careers for those who make the finals.

Getting produced is the goal, but the reality is it is a long shot. Actually, it is more like a buzzer beater three-quarter-court desperation shot when your team, the lowest seed in the tournament after a Cinderella-run, is down by three in the national championship. You not only make it to tie the game, you get fouled and head to the free-throw line while the rabid home crowd of the undefeated #1 team in the country does everything possible to make you miss. All alone on the line, because the clock has run out, you clank it but somehow it bounces three times on the rim and finally rolls through. You now get to take the place of Christian Laettner as the most hated college basketball player. On the other hand, one of my former students, Jamie Linden, wrote We Are Marshall, and it was his first. Diablo Cody’s, Juno was not only her first but won an Oscar for original screenplay. Hope springs eternal on the court and for those pounding on the keyboard into the wee hours of the night on that last rewrite.

… check back for Part II of this interview with Erik V. Wolter!

The first thing to remember is that stories come from a character’s journey. The character’s journey is made up of two things; a want and a need. What does this character want, what is his/her mission? What does this character need, what is his/her character flaw that is preventing them from getting what they want? The idea of want and need is what forms the sequences and the acts of the story.

Now what is a sequence? We all know the idea of a three act structure: Act I (The Beginning), Act II (The New World/Mission), and Act III (The Resolution). Well, sequences are what makes up those Acts. A movie can be broken down into eight sequences. Sequences one and two make up Act I, sequences three through seven make up Act II, usually with a twist, i.e. the character arc, happening at the end of Act II which leads into sequence eight in Act III; the resolution.

So, let’s look at a classic movie, The Graduate, and break it down. This is a summary of The Graduate according to IMDB:

Recent college graduate Benjamin Braddock is trapped into an affair with Mrs. Robinson, who happens to be the wife of his father’s business partner and then finds himself falling in love with her daughter, Elaine.

That’s the summary, but how can we break it down? The first question is ‘what does Benjamin want?’ He’s just graduated college, he’s returned home and the one burning question is what is he gonna do next? But Benjamin doesn’t have an answer. That’s his character’s want: He wants to figure out what he’s gonna do next. Next question: what is his character’s need? What is his character flaw? If you watch the movie you’ll notice one thing keeps summing Benjamin up – he doesn’t make decisions, he doesn’t take action. The opening of the movie is him on a moving walkway, everyone else walking by him, but he’s just being pulled and taken to his location. This sums up his character – he needs to walk, he needs to make a decision and take action.

Now that we have our want and our need, let’s break the movie down into sequences.

ACT I

Sequence One – Will Benjamin get time alone, away from everyone? He keeps trying to escape the party, but people keep finding him. His only escape is to take Mrs. Robinson home.

POINT OF ATTACK (INCITING INCIDENT) – Mrs. Robinson makes herself available.

Sequence Two – Will Benjamin call Mrs. Robinson? He’s been propositioned but will he actually take the opportunity. Ultimately he does call her. A whole new world opens up to him.

ACT II

Sequence Three – Will Benjamin get a room? This might be a simple decision for a different character, but as we’ve established Benjamin isn’t one to make decisions. He actually has to be told by Mrs. Robinson to get a room. Even then he still has difficulty doing it.

Sequence Four – Will Benjamin sleep with Mrs. Robinson? Funny how we remember this as being what the movie is about, while really it took a while to get there.

MID POINT – Remember that montage of Benjamin by the pool and then with Mrs. Robinson to Simon and Garfunkel’s music? Yup, we’re in the middle of the movie.

Sequence Five – Will Benjamin take out Elaine? Mrs. Robinson didn’t want him to and he’s forced into it by his parents.

Sequence Six – Will Benjamin get Elaine back? He came clean about the affair too late and Elaine goes back to school. But Benjamin is starting to make decisions, so he goes after her, only to be told that she’s getting married.

Sequence Seven – Will Benjamin stop Elaine’s wedding?

CHARACTER TWIST – After finally making a decision and acting on it, Benjamin ends up literally banging on the glass screaming for Elaine at the end of her wedding. Symbolic for a man who couldn’t take action regarding his future – he’s literally screaming at it. In doing this he also triggers Elaine’s character arc to complete – she screams for him and runs away from the family and situation that’s always telling her what to do.

ACT III

Sequence Eight – Will Benjamin and Elaine get away/get a ride? They hitch a ride on a bus and head off into the sunset. Our hero and his bride end up sitting together on the back of the bus. Benjamin is seemingly sitting next to his future.

As they drive away that famous look of “what now” comes over them. You could argue that this means he hasn’t changed or had a character arc. I personally don’t think that’s the case. Just because you manage to take action doesn’t mean you won’t have to take more. We’re all running to get somewhere and once we get there, we wonder where to go next.

So those are the sequences of The Graduate. Obviously it’s almost cinephile sacrilege to break a masterpiece like The Graduate down in such simple terms, but the lesson here is that we, as humans, are wired to follow patterns, anticipate, ask questions and search for resolution. That’s why (again, almost) any great film you break into acts and sequences will follow a certain pattern. Such are the mechanics of storytelling and there’s a lot to be learned from tearing apart your favorite stories and breaking them down into impossibly simple building blocks.

My name is Rachel Noll, and I’m the producer and co-writer of the film, as well as one of the lead actresses. I look forward to sharing our ongoing journey with you as we move into pre-production and production on the film. With this online production diary, which will likely be passed between key crew and cast members to add their perspectives throughout, we hope to give you all a window into the process of producing an independent film from start to finish. Along the way, we encourage you to ask questions in the comments section below. We’ll happily answer.

The Storyteller began as an abstract idea that Joe Crump, the director and co-writer, brought to me. “What if” he said, “we explored the story of a young girl who is immortal? What would it be like to live for hundreds of years? How lonely would that be? How would the world change?”

The goals of this film were threefold:

1. Create a feature-film we could shoot for under $100K in Indiana, where Joe resides.
2. Create a story that contained elements of magic and the fantastical.
3. Bring in a musical element that would help tie the story together and unite the characters, as in movies like Once and Begin Again.

Joe and I have often discussed how creating a script is like putting a puzzle together… You have a table full of pieces, and it’s our job as writers to figure out how they all fit together into one compelling picture.

I would sit down and write 20 pages to send along to Joe, and those 20 pages would inspire us to completely rethink a character or a key element of the script. And back to page 1 we would go. By the time we had a completed first draft, it hardly resembled the original concept we had outlined. It had become something else entirely – a rich, complex and multi-dimensional story about people finding their way back to themselves, with a clear message about creating the life we want on our terms. It felt like the story had taken us by the hand and lead us where it wanted to go, guiding us gently scene by scene.

The writing process often feels like this, in my experience. We come to each draft with our own ideas and notions of where it should go, but more often than not, the characters and the story dictate to us where they want to go next, not the other way around. There have been times when Joe and I have sat with a scene and had no idea what was coming next… and then an inspiration would strike one of us, and all of a sudden the world would open up again.

Writing a script is truly a process of trust, openness, patience, collaboration, and a willingness to try things. Like improv – sometimes it’s just saying yes to the inspiration, wherever it comes from and however it shows up.

In the end, what was born was a story about Abby, a young girl believing herself to be immortal who helps to heal a dysfunctional family as she explores a world teeming with magic to escape the traumas of a dark past.

Now that we have a shoot-ready script, we are moving rapidly into the pre-production phase. There are two elements that we felt we needed to nail down early on; one being the main cast members, and the second being the musicians we will be collaborating with on the music for the film.

Currently, the script is out to a handful of talented indie musicians. We want to find the right fit – someone to help us write the music, collaborate with the actors who will be singing and playing on screen, and create a soundtrack that we can promote and sell along with the film itself. There are two original songs in the film that need to be written, and a cover of the old spiritual Wayfaring Stranger that needs a unique update. The musicians are working away on songs as we speak.

Simultaneously, I put out the film’s first casting call on Breakdown Services, and received submissions for the main four roles from actors all over the country. Technology is amazing; it allows us to see and experience the talents of actors we might not otherwise be able to see. Due to our budget constraints, we are only able to consider actors who can work as Indiana local hires. The number of talented actors who live and work there blew me away!

We wanted to start the casting process early because the roles we need to cast are rigorous and require specific talents. Our lead actress, Abby, is a 12 year old girl with wisdom and maturity well beyond her years. She has to carry the film on her back, and we know that finding the right fit for this role is make or break for the movie. Two of the other lead characters have to sing and play instruments with skill in a specific style. This also requires a very particular kind of actor and collaborative attitude to make it work.

We have seen and narrowed down our list of actors and are holding callbacks in the next couple of months to find our cast. Once we have our cast, and have settled on musicians and songwriters to collaborate with, we will be able to lock in our shoot dates for 2016, begin working on the music with the actors and the musicians, and start preliminary character rehearsals.

In our upcoming blogs, I will be taking off my writing hat and putting on my producer hat to talk you through the pre-production checklist in real time, so you can get a feel for what happens when, and how to make sure your checklist is complete before you go into production. Until next time!

Got any questions about the writing or casting process? Post them below!

You may have already read the three winning submissions. We wanted to also share these three honorable mentions, let you do your own comparisons and – perhaps – be all the better a reader/writer for it.

SCRIPT READER: GERMAINE SIMS

OVERALL: Before I Wake is a fantasy action adventure feature that centers on the exploits of a feisty twelve year old computer hacker named Hanna. The project has elements reminiscent of role-player video games: science-fiction based universe, party of characters embarking on a quest, the solving of a riddle central to the conclusion of the storyline, protagonist with special powers/abilities, combat sequences, and thematic elements which explore the possible destruction of the universe. Thematically the project also explores the concepts of alienation and loss, coming of age, rebellion, and strained family relationships.

Visually, Before I Wake, could be realized utilizing a variety of methods (i.e Live Action, Animation, CGI, Anime). While the premise presents the possibility of franchise and ancillary marketing options, the story/character development needs reworking to fully capitalize on any of these possible opportunities.

PREMISE: Before I Wake has promising aspects; however, the narrative veers into a number of directions causing the storyline to feel unfocused. The project may best be served by reducing the premise to its fundamental elements, rather than combining so many competing variables into one storyline.

The strength of the project lies in the crux of the premise: A crafty adolescent girl hacks a virtual network operating system in order to save society from being obliterated by a virus rigged to destroy humanity. Hone in on this aspect of the concept.

Despite the science-fiction element, there is an aspect of this concept that feels dated. Some sequences read like early internet circa AOL era. Any attempts to delve into the techie world requires a tremendous amount of research and foresight. It may be helpful to conduct research in publications like (MIT Review), or online educational databases like (iSeekEduction, RefSeek, Virtual LRC). The teenage hacker premise is edgy and entertaining, just be careful to convey Hanna’s world in a manner that will be novel for the audience.

STRUCTURE: The project delivers a story with a discernable beginning, middle, and end ultimately driving to a conclusion; however, the narrative is overladen with far too many components. As the script stands now, the complicated and top-heavy narrative circumvents the opportunity for future franchises.

Fundamentally, there are two different stories in this project: Hanna’s search for the truth about how her mom died, and Nanako’s journey to learn the truth about her origin. An argument can be made for why these two storylines thematically support one another. Yet, this project may benefit from breaking these two storylines into two separate scripts.

Allowing Hanna’s story to be the sole premise driving events, could strengthen the overall potential of Before I Wake, as well as provide an opportunity for future installments. Hanna is an intriguing protagonist, but there are a number of facets in her experiences that are left unexplored, simply because the current draft tries to go in so many different directions. There is enough potential for conflict in both Hanna and Nanako’s experiences to carry two separate screenplays.

The overladen narrative also causes problems with believability. Science-fiction and fantasy based features are dependent on the ability to effectively establish the logic of the world that is being created. There is so much going on in Before I Wake that many questions are left unanswered. For example, information is revealed about how Baptiste created Raven (109). However, by the end of the project we still have no idea why Baptiste created Raven in the first place? What purpose did Raven serve in Baptiste’s life? How does Raven’s creation relate to Baptiste and Maya’s relationship? Is Maya a form of Artificial Intelligence? If so, where did she come from? Furthermore, we are told Baptiste has been luring girls for an experiment (59.6), but we never learn the purpose the experiment serves. How are the girl’s disappearances connected to Maya and Baptiste? Why were the AI children created?

Artificial Intelligence, Virtual Reality, viruses, the end of humanity as we know it, Smoke Raven, ghosts, gaming, family dysfunction, maniacal scientist: these are just a few of the topics touched on in the script. Focus on simplifying the story and develop the logic for chosen science- fiction elements. For example, the film Her (2013), centers on a man (Theodore) falling in love with his computer operating system. A far-fetched concept is conveyed believably because so much time is spent developing the rules of Theodore’s world, and the sci-fi elements are not entirely reliant on action sequences.

CHARACTERS: Hanna is a strong protagonist. She has a back-story and wants/needs that give her a compelling reason to work towards an identifiable goal. The project contains an ensemble cast offering roles that may be attractive to a variety of actors. Although this project has role-player video game conventions (i.e. party working toward a common goal), there are far too many supporting characters. A number of the supporting characters are interesting, but they distract from the through-line of the story and distort Hanna’s character arc. Characters typically need to experience growth or change by the end of the story. Although Hanna discovers the truth about her mother’s death (124), she does not experience any significant internal or external shift as a result of her discovery. In the beginning of the project she is headstrong and at the end of the project she still has the same “bad-ass” quality.

Spend more time developing the relationship between Hanna and Conrad. The narrative alludes to Conrad’s absentee status (43.8) and Hanna’s disappointment about being neglected by her dad (54.9). This is a wise choice by the writer because emotional subtext gives fantasy based stories a sense of “realness.” For example, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (2014) is a compelling feature because the character relationships are well developed. The drama is derived from the character’s emotional conflicts, not just sci-fi action sequences. Further exploration of Hanna and Conrad’s relationship will build more conflict.

Before I Wake alludes to a possible love interest developing between Hanna and Max (26.9), but never follows through with exploring this relationship. Action projects typically have a romance sub-plot. Although, there is a love interest storyline between Oku and Jimmy, the project may best be served by focusing on Hanna and Max’s budding relationship.

The project also needs a stronger antagonist. Antagonists typically serve the role of blocking the protagonist from reaching their goal. There are no direct competing interests between Baptiste and Hanna. Because the storyline is so convoluted, Hanna is inadvertently going up against Baptiste and the Smoke Raven simply because a supporting character convinces her to do so. The protagonist and antagonist should go toe-to-toe based on directly competing interests.

FURTHER SUGGESTIONS: Edit for typos (i.e. there are some spelling/grammar issues in the opening sequence). Before I Wake has promising elements. Developing a stronger antagonist and paring down the story may strengthen the project. Spend subsequent rewrites focusing on emotion, clarity, and simplification.

ABOUT GERMAINE SIMS: Germaine Sims is a Script Reader/Story Analyst who has provided script coverage and development services for a variety of entertainment professionals.  Contact her for script consultant services at her website or email.

SCRIPT READER: DEREK USTRUCK

LOGLINE: A young girl fights to save all of humanity when a virtual reality simulation goes wrong.

SYNOPSIS: In 19^th Century Europe, sisters, SARAH (13) and NANAKO (8), are on the run from a smoke raven- a supernatural beast. Sarah uses her powers to transport them to a far off jungle, but it doesn’t work. The beast is still on their trail. Nanako gives it a shot- she has the powers, too. They shift, once more, onto a boat. Something goes wrong; Sarah’s powers make her ill. The Smoke Raven appears, they were only playing tag.

Sarah is called in front of her father, BAPTISTE, on a floating platform. He rather, callously, sentences her to death by disintegration.

We flash to HANNA (12), as she follows her father, CONRAD and his friends OKU and JIMMY into a competition arena, where they are competing in a high-stakes version of laser tag. She gets them banned from the tournament for two weeks- that is until the opponent’s team leader, SAM, forgives the error. The game is on. Hanna wins the match with an incredible whirlwind power.

Outside of the game, life is a bit more humdrum. Conrad orders her to visit her GRANDFATHER, but not before her sentient robot dog RAGS makes her a sandwich.

We learn about the CRASH: a VR event that killed 3 million people, through the eyes of Oku, Jimmy, and Sam.

RANSOM wasn’t expecting Hanna, but he needs help with the turbines, she obliges. There are drawbacks to entering the VR world, Hanna’s mother was killed there (doesn’t say it here, but it might as well).

Back on the ship with Baptiste, Nanako is adjusted with some sort of upload… the same one that caused her sister to be terminated.

At the house, Hanna goes back into the VR with Rags. She is limited to the kid’s server- run by the Baptiste Corporation (though there is no way to know that Baptiste is Baptiste).

Meanwhile, Nanako is sent back to the same European town. Her task is to break through a door. When she asks about her sister’s fate, Baptiste offers only vague responses. Baptiste is revealed to be an Avatar. His true form is sickly and on the verge of death.

Deep inside the castle, Hanna encounters a ghost, MELIES, who wants to hire her for a job. She wants to take a beat to think about it. At her home, she finds her father has escaped into cyberspace, where he can interact with memories of her dead mother- who turns out to have been a hacker.

Back in the real world, Baptiste announces a grand party, while assuring people that the CRASH that killed so many will never happen again. (what is the plot of this film)? Hanna decides to enter Baptiste’s secure tower (when/why?) It says that Melies told her to, but that is not in the text. At the tower, Hanna is subjected to the same process that Nanako experienced. Conrad wakes to find his daughter is gone. In the tower, the Smoke Raven guides Hanna to Baptiste while Rags guides Conrad through a replay of the Castle. Here we discover Melies offer: he has opened the door for her to enter the tower. Conrad assembles his team: they are going after his daughter.

Nanako is introduced to Hanna who gives her some vague and unsettling answers to her questions. Hanna promises to take Nanako with her when she escapes.

Conrad and his team are with Melies, we find that he was the child of Maya Baptiste (though there is no way to know who she is)- and he is AI and haunted by the ghosts of the crash victims. Melies informs Conrad of Baptiste’s diabolical plan to create AI from orphan girls and its origins with his wife, Maya’s illness.

Hanna and Nanako create a diversion and occupy the Smoke Raven so that they can infiltrate Baptiste’s office. Nanako’s real body dies, she is only real on the server now. They discover that the Smoke Raven is the virus that caused so many deaths.

The girls continue to press forward; they find the back door into the office and enter.

The next night, Conrad and his team enter the party with false credentials. With fifteen minutes between visits from the Smoke Raven, the girls fan out again. Finding themselves at a locked door, Hanna starts to hack it. They use a rocket that Hanna constructs to infiltrate the spaceship where Baptiste’s office is hidden.

During the party, Baptiste’s real body dies and freezes his avatar. Once again, CPR brings him back to life. The Smoke Raven removes him from the party, and Conrad, et al follow.

In the mainframe control room, the virus that claimed her sister overtakes Nanako, but Hanna stops it before it can overwhelm her. Meanwhile, Conrad and the team search through the labyrinthine palace for the server. He stumbles upon Baptiste uploading himself to the server. The Smoke Raven takes Jimmy. Hanna and Nanako manage to connect the private server to the real world- they have a chance.

Baptiste reveals to Conrad that this server is private so that they can contain the Smoke Raven, before he can upload himself the process fails. He evaporates- it’s too late. The girls realize what they have done. Now, they have to stop the Smoke Raven. Rags joins with the girls, and transforms into a winged beast.

Melies joins Conrad and Oku. They watch as the Smoke Raven wreaks havoc on the server. Another Crash is imminent.

Hanna attacks, but the Smoke Raven knocks her out. Oku heals her while Rags distracts the beast. Rags is defeated, but the battle rages on. Nanako and Melies join forces, they invade the Smoke Raven and defeat it. (somehow Jimmy is back). Hanna is briefly reunited with the ghost of her mother, who heaps adulation upon her daughter.

A few months down the road, the players are back in the battle game. Everybody is happy, and Hanna is a star player and Max (mentioned once a hundred pages ago, is her boyfriend).

COMMENTS: Before I Wake is an imaginative romp in speculative fiction. The writers have constructed an elaborate and complex world, replete with its own rules and version of the AI playground that we have seen in such novels as Neuromancer and Ready Player One. It uses familiar shortcuts that we have seen in films like The Matrix and Strange Days to lighten the expositional load on the reader/viewer.

The characters, while not the most original, are fairly well-drawn, though there is some trouble disambiguating Hanna, Anna, and Nanako as their overall motivations seem to be fairly similar. That being said, relying on archetypical characters in this venue limits the depth that can be added. The screenplay focuses on the experiences of Hanna, a young girl blessed with preternatural skills to traverse the VR landscape that millions of people inhabit. Thankfully, the script does not explore at great length the platitude of “the real world is more exciting than the virtual” as so many in this genre do.

The authors succeed in creating a work that follows the principals of rising action- the script and its stakes do increase as the story progresses, and the energy level maintains a fairly frenetic pace through out.

Despite its achievements, I cannot recommend this script for development. While none of the reasons, individually, warrant a pass. Cumulatively, they detract enough from the value of the property to prevent engagement.

VIABILITY: Before I Wake is a prohibitively expensive film to make with any reasonable production value. Even if it were to be considered as an animation project (though serialized TV might be an option: see later notes), the costs of building such a stand-alone without pre-existing IP are too great. Furthermore, the target demographic is hard to discern. I am confident that the script would generate a PG-13 rating, however, the market for PG-13 Animation and/or Sci-Fi films of this scope is rather small.

PLOT: A general note, would be to simplify the story. At page 58, there was finally a clear direction- a mission. This is way too late for the audience to be told what the protagonist is trying to accomplish, and way too late for the journey to begin. Trimming elements of the film, and truly understanding what the story is meant to be will dramatically affect that sense of meandering malaise that overwhelms the first third of the script. What is the film about? Why is Hanna chosen? These questions need to be answered far earlier. Without that, the script seems to be exceedingly episodic as the reader struggles for the teleological principle that underpins and guides the film.

The structure of the film is fairly linear, but the writers’ frequent use of cutaways and flashbacks bogs the film down at times. This is particularly noticeable once the protagonists have entered the server- as there is no real visual differentiation in the spaces, and, outside of the slugs, there is no way to ground the reader and, by extension, the viewer. The screenwriters also overuse a melodramatic story-telling device by withholding information from the reader that the protagonist uses to inform their decision making process. They then dole that information back out using flashbacks, effectively derailing the momentum of the film. This is also, quite literally, the opposite of dramatic irony. However, since most of these flashbacks fill in beats that the savvy audience member would have divined via gestalt, even the “Oceans 11 plan” trope doesn’t function at the level that justifies its inclusion. At 128 pages, the script is too long. Removing the copious amounts of flashbacks and cross-cutting of the A and B stories would dramatically trim page count, and provide space for elements that need to be expanded, such as…

CHARACTER: The characters make sense, but that’s because we have seen them all: the Father struggling with the loss of the mother, the wunderkind bucking against authority as a way of dealing with loss, and the scientist who has lost his way on account of a great loss. These are off-the-shelf genre tropes, and ostensibly a great shortcut to telling films that have a certain dialectical quality. It is, though, the duty of the screenwriter to conceive unique plot beats that differentiate these characters from those that we have seen so many times. What is unique about their vocabulary? How does their world-view shape their decision-making? What are the universals made specific that makes me love this protagonist. How is this protagonist different from the other characters? (They should either be perfect for the task, or the least qualified). The complicated plot gets in the way of character development. There are only so many pages in a screenplay, and using them economically is what good writers do best. Integrating plot and character beats is the best way to handle exposition. The previously mentioned abundance of flashbacks is generally one of the weakest (except when they are not). There could be something to limiting the number of characters in the script. As it stands now, there are too many poorly drawn actors in the story. It would be more effective to see fewer well-drawn characters.

VOICE: It’s always hard for teams to develop a truly unique voice on the page, but that’s not in the scope of this assessment. There are some fundamental issues with the style and flair of the authors. Firstly, there are some formatting errors. This is not a deal breaker, but the lack of use of CAPS for sound effects, etc. is a lost opportunity to infuse some excitement into the script. At even more fundamental level, the syntax of the writers needs to be more dynamic. I am being sold a visual story, not an intellectual one. Finding ways to construct sentences that aren’t SUBJECT, VERB, OBJECT are of paramount importance, but one of the key skillsets missing is the capability to turn vague ideas into visual beats. Each line of action should be a shot in the readers mind. “Nanako takes his hand in hers: is an example. How would this be shot? “Fingers loop together. Nanako and Melies join hands.” The descriptive acumen of the writers needs to be significantly improved. The visual elements of the fantasy world could be more dynamically drawn and rendered for the reader’s mind’s eye. Ultimately, the area, which needs the most substantial improvement, is the emotional engagement of the characters to the viewers. That is the lynchpin of successful storytelling- finding characters that the audience will follow anywhere.

CONCLUSION: The authors clearly have an imagination. The prospects of this film being produced are very small, though there might be more opportunity if it were to be reworked into a 30 minute YA animated series. It will, after more revisions, be a workable sample that they might use to find representation and/or use as a calling card in search of assignment work. I would highly suggest spending the next couple months deconstructing the script to its essential elements, making a more diligent effort to track the emotional storyline, and stream-line the plot so that space can be used in service of the previous goals, before submitting Before I Wake to either contests or agents/managers.

SCRIPT READER: JESSICA ROSE

Before I start the review, I want to say that the hope is you are able to have this script finalized for marketing as soon as possible, because it is a great concept and is an amazing, creative story that is very detailed with absolute perfect imagination that comes to life on the pages.

With that being said, although we can compare this story to The Hunger Games as far as the futurist part, your script is another layer of actions that are not too farfetched for the future and very believable. The characters have great descriptions and build.

One thing I could not find was a typo. None whatsoever, which makes a great compliment in itself, however, in the need to be able to follow the story, I feel the below suggestions will make it an easier read for a producer without taking away from the imagination of the reader’s mind.

The below bullet points are not in any order, but I feel will make the script an easier read:

• Except for the narrative “set up” scenes at the beginning of the script and some throughout, there was too much narrative in the pages. Rework the narratives and show the story you are telling through your characters’ dialogues.
• Cut the script to 120 pages. Although there are exceptions, fitting it to 90-120 pages is one of the first things some producers look at, no matter how OCD and/or procedural that may seem.
• Combine some of the scenes. There are two dimensions going on and I feel they jump around too much. Although I see why they jump from one to the other and can understand, there are several scenes you can combine together in one of the dimensions before jumping to the other. This will also make it more understandable for those “not out there” minds. There are also some scene headings that can be a continuation from the prior scene where the narrative describes the location, however, from a crew member’s benefit for set build, may or may not be required.
• The combining of the scenes from each dimension will also help the characters’ introduction. When the characters are introduced back and forth from each part of the story, it may be overwhelming for the producer reading the script. If the scenes are more combined in the beginning and more of each side is told at once, it will give the reader time to absorb the different characters and their place in the story.
• Give more clarification through the characters’ dialogue as to what is going on with each dimension. Is it the planet earth participating in virtual reality games that is controlled by one server which is a space ship or is it a dream land that one can place himself in and that is their virtual reality? Of course, you may want to make it to where the reader can set up an imagination of their own.
• I took it as Nanako and Melies as being some type of computer function being created by Baptiste, however, that may not be the case. If not, try to clarify them more, even though their presence is basically understandable as is…or is it?
• I am also assuming that the Smoke Raven was a creation-gone-wrong that Baptiste created or the major virus that crashed the server and killed many of the virtual reality participants and Baptiste is keeping it quarantined. Maya and Baptiste were somewhat confusing. If I had the chance to reread the script, it may all come to light, but even with these questionable aspects, the story is amazing. Think in the producer’s mind how he/she will be very busy and will need to grasp the concept pretty easily and define more without defining…if you know what I mean.

Below are specific questions I had when reading certain areas of the story. If the below questions are all I had for a script of this depth and imagination, that tells you how great the script was written. Hope the suggestions help and please keep me informed as to when it will be on the big screen! Congratulations on a job well done!

• Page 4 – This page with Sarah and Baptiste is confusing even after reading the entire script.
• First several pages up through 6 simply introduced too many characters in different realms. Combine the scenes as previously noted and let each group of characters stay a little longer in their part of the story from the start and throughout the finish. Especially at the start, drawing out their scene to include their next scene will give the character build a better understanding as to who everyone is.
• Page 7 – How does Hannah’s father know it is her if she entered on his password? Do the characters look like themselves?
• Too much happening on page 8. Clarify the position of Sam also.
• Page 10 – The sprouting of the legs and eyes seems too much like other sci-fi movies. Leave it as a bomb.
• Page 11 – Unclear where Kalyn goes. Does everyone have power to open portals?
• Page 12 – Scene = INT, however, Sam is in courtyard. How did he shoot them so easily if they were inside?
• Page 12 – All narrative
• Page 120 – Very confusing and I started losing understanding.

ABOUT JESSICA ROSE: Jessica is currently making her way to a full time screenwriting career. She completed a comedy/western feature film in January as a hired write and is excited about it’s production. Although new in the industry, she has several different screenwriting classes under her belt with some of the industry’s leading  producers and managers. Her current projects include comedy, drama, and horror genres. Jessica is available for hire to help critique your scripts. You may contact Jessica by joining her network on Stage32.com.